Too many times we walk through life blind. We do not see that which is in front of us. Sometimes it is by accident, sometimes it is because it distracts us, but sometimes it is because we ignored the signs. The signs instructing us in Avoiding the Signs Warning of the Hole we call the Pitfalls of Life.

Avoiding the Signs Warning of the Hole we call the Pitfalls of Life come in many forms. Verbal. Visual. Physical. Internal.

The question you need to ask yourself is “why did I choose this road?” Whose direction did I arrive at this place by? Was it mine, or was I lead? Did I decide this was the direction I wanted to go, or was I convinced by someone, or something else?

More often than we wish to admit, we as humans decide based on being influenced rather than having true independent thoughts. Between social media, the media, our social “tribe”, our families, friends, teachers, and spiritual advisors, our thoughts and patterns in life are molded and create us in the image they wish for us. The question to you is how do you prevent from falling into the pitfalls of life?

It was spring. The sun was shining, the birds were singing as I was walking to work looking forward to another great day at the new job I had worked so hard to land. It was a great place to work, good people, fun work, fantastic environment, the clients, and boss loved me. Little did I realize how much my life would change in such a short time when I encountered “The Hole”.

The Hole , is the experience we encounter if we ignore the signs we see every day in life. Allow me to explain.

Day one: I was walking to work that day and had a great deal on my mind. I had argued with a co-worker, my girlfriend was unhappy with my “obsession” with work, my friends complained I never came around anymore, and my parents never heard from me.

As I was walking and rationalizing these things out loud, I collapsed into an large hole. It came out of nowhere. I never saw it coming. It was deep, dark, scary, and I could not get out. I felt afraid. I could not get out alone. Without Avoiding the Signs Warning of the Hole we call the Pitfalls of Life, I became trapped.

It seemed like forever before anyone noticed I was there. I could not get out alone. This was the first stage of my experience.

My day now became worse. I rationalized that this was not my fault. Why weren’t their signs posted that a hole was here? Why wasn’t someone here to help me? I did not deserve this. This was the first stage of my experience.

Day two: I walked down the same street. The birds did not sing, and the clouds covered the brightness and warmth of the sun. I was not happy. I saw the hole. It was enormous! I saw many signs that said “DANGER”. As I fell into the hole again, I remember thinking “why am I doing this, it’s dark, its cold, and I’m afraid.”

It seemed like forever before anyone noticed I was there. I could not get out alone, again. This was the second stage of my experience.

Day three: I was walking down the same street. It was warmer than the day before. As I approached the hole, I took notice of the jagged edges I could have hurt myself on the days before. It was the largest hole ever in existence in all of mankind. Looking around I found something to make a larger warning sign, not wanting anyone who came behind me to fall for fear of hurting themselves.

I made it large, really large so everyone could see. I remember feeling that I had done such a wonderful thing as I walked around the hole. It felt so good to know someone would not have to go through what I went through.

 I cringed when I heard someone scream as they fell into the hole behind me.

This was the third stage of my experience.

Day four: The sun was shining, and the birds were singing as I walked down a different street. This was the last stage of my experience.

Now when I walk to work (or anywhere) I pay close attention to all the wonderful things I had missed and taken for granted and did not take the time to notice the days before. I enjoy my walks more now. I seem to walk a lot these days. I hear many people behind me falling into the hole. I guess they did not see the signs either.

Holes or Pitfalls to Avoid in Life

1. Blindly Following A Path

Buddha says:

“Do not believe in anything because you have heard it. Do not believe in anything because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything because we find it written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders. Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it.”

Someone told the person in the story that the route to take was correct, yet they encountered a pitfall. The person who gave the directions possibly knew of the pitfall, maybe they did not. We define ignorance as lacking knowledge of something. They did not see the hole and fell in.

2. Magnifying Your Failures

Failure is our best teacher, embrace it. Imagine if when you fell the first time you decided never to walk because it was hard or hurt. The thought never crossed your mind because you had an adventurous spirit and wanted the freedom walking would bring. Now as an adult you are fearful of what might be without finding out. So you never try. Image staying in the hole because it was too deep, too dark, or that you felt scared.

3. Settle for Less Than What You Want

Too many times in life people “settle” for second best. It is not what you want but, in your mind, you somehow think you only deserve what you settled for. This is a trap. I call them complacency traps.

4. Avoiding Fear and Uncomfortable Situations

I get it. It’s tough to walk into your boss’ office and demand a raise or go up to that popular girl at the bar and introduce yourself. It’s frightening. You don’t know what will happen, and there’s a reasonable chance that you may not get the desired outcome.

It is only through reaching outside of our comfort zone that we can expand what is in our life.

It’s the things we must work for and take a risk to get we treasure the most in life.

Yes, you might experience the sting of rejection, but the courage needed for taking a chance will build, like strengthening any muscle, and you’ll become bolder and more courageous in other things in life too.

5. Believe Discouraging Thoughts

We all have negative thoughts.. However, we have the choice to believe those thoughts or not.

And it sure is easy to believe them. We thought them up or someone “important” told them to us, so they must be true, right?

Keep in mind though, that just because you have a limiting or discouraging thought about your own abilities or value does NOT mean that you must accept that belief.

You can choose what beliefs you will accept and which ones you will not. Even if you’re unable to control anything else in your life, you can always control your thoughts.

The important thing is to not feel bad if you see yourself in any of these 5 holes or pitfalls. Often, we may not be aware of what we’re doing, so you shouldn’t feel bad when you discover something counter-productive. Instead, celebrate its discovery and correct your course as needed.

The journey to achieving your life goals may not always be a straight line, but finding your path amidst it all is one of the biggest joys in life.

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